Draft:
On that picture one of the players from the All Blacks is trying to shake hands with a player from the other team. the All Blacks and the players from the other table showing respect by looking at each other and shaking at the same time.
feedback:
Great work you try your best and I like what you said about the All blacks trying to shake their hand from another team and some of them need to make sense by the way keep it up.
Final:
On that picture one of the players from the All Blacks is trying to shake hands with a player from the other team. the All Blacks and the players from the other table showing respect by looking at each other and shaking at the same time.
Hi Kade, my name is Miss McCormick and I teach at Wigram Primary School. I decided to come and have a look at what you at South Hornby have been doing and I stumbled across your blog. The thing that first caught my eye was the picture you have of the All Blacks! I think having a picture first is really eye catching, well done! It is obvious that you have learnt and understand about respect and what respect means, even in Sport it is important!
ReplyDeleteNext time, see if you can get all your writing into one blog post, it got a wee bit hard to read the writing outside of the blog box! But I managed with this ok, it could be something to work on for next time.
I like how you put a picture to let us know what you were writing about and you wrote heaps I like your story kade good job
ReplyDelete